I may be in the minority here, but have any of you ever just wanted to go stand outside, scream and yell, until your lungs burn and your throat is hoarse? For me, it doesn't really matter what environment, I just need to scream, yell, cry, shout...just release frustration, anger, hurt. It probably wouldn't matter to me whether I was in the middle of a crowded mall or on a desolate island. I just need to let it out. It's almost like a purge. An expelling of what you've bottled inside for too long. Just a good scream, followed by a good cry, followed by bewildered stares as people contemplate getting you locked away somewhere :)
No, I haven't screamed or yelled but I have sure felt like it. I just want someone to hear me. I just want to vent. Maybe even hit something. Yep, I said it. I'd love to have a baseball bat and an old junk car. I just want to get God's attention. I want to ask him why? Why everything? Why now? But unfortunately we can't put question marks where God keeps putting periods. We can't question his plan because it's just that...his. Not my will but his. It's all just so much. From experience, don't ever ask yourself "what next?" because undoubtedly something else is probably just around the corner. It's not anything you can plan for or bargain out. It's just going to be there. It's not what it is but what you realize and what you choose to feel or do about it.
So today, I chose to pray. Today I chose to cry. Today I chose to trust. As I read my bible today, I read:
"Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?"
Nothing that I'm going through, no valley I cross, no distress I encounter is going to separate me from the Love of Christ. He still loves me though I'm troubled. He wants to give me peace and comfort and rest. He wants to gather my family in his arms and love us. It's just so hard to see it through all the mess sometimes. Through the sobbing, heartache, and exhaustion it's easy to forget that he does love us. He hasn't abandoned us. He is still there and will make his presence known to us if we look for him.
Scream if you need to. Cry if you must. But cling to his side. Let him wrap his arms around you. Ask him to walk with you. Ask him for guidance. He's there....always there. Nothing on this side of heaven will separate you from him unless you let it. Keep looking up.
No, I haven't screamed or yelled but I have sure felt like it. I just want someone to hear me. I just want to vent. Maybe even hit something. Yep, I said it. I'd love to have a baseball bat and an old junk car. I just want to get God's attention. I want to ask him why? Why everything? Why now? But unfortunately we can't put question marks where God keeps putting periods. We can't question his plan because it's just that...his. Not my will but his. It's all just so much. From experience, don't ever ask yourself "what next?" because undoubtedly something else is probably just around the corner. It's not anything you can plan for or bargain out. It's just going to be there. It's not what it is but what you realize and what you choose to feel or do about it.
So today, I chose to pray. Today I chose to cry. Today I chose to trust. As I read my bible today, I read:
"Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?"
Nothing that I'm going through, no valley I cross, no distress I encounter is going to separate me from the Love of Christ. He still loves me though I'm troubled. He wants to give me peace and comfort and rest. He wants to gather my family in his arms and love us. It's just so hard to see it through all the mess sometimes. Through the sobbing, heartache, and exhaustion it's easy to forget that he does love us. He hasn't abandoned us. He is still there and will make his presence known to us if we look for him.
Scream if you need to. Cry if you must. But cling to his side. Let him wrap his arms around you. Ask him to walk with you. Ask him for guidance. He's there....always there. Nothing on this side of heaven will separate you from him unless you let it. Keep looking up.